You know Sonja and I have been dating since we were like 15 or something? And I can tell we're drifting further and further apart. Even. "Friday 19:20" in S3 E03

Between old and new

One of the more confusing aspects to Isak's experience in Season 3 is how often Even seems to run hot and cold, in terms of his interest toward Isak. From Episode 1-2, Even seems to be very interested in Isak, until we—along with Isak—realize he's got a girlfriend at the end of Episode 2. Despite coming to the party at Isak's place in Episode 3 with his girlfriend Sonja (Vilde insisted on using Isak's place for the kose-group party because no one else could host it), Even gives every indication he's interested in Isak. Then in Episode 4, when Isak texts Even hoping to hang out again, Even seems to gently rebuff Isak. But when they see each other at school two days later, Even again seems to be interested.

The biggest, most obvious issue in all of this is the fact Even is in effect cheating on Sonja (until Episode 5, when he tells her about Isak). No matter how much Even and Isak's relationship later progresses, this fact doesn't change. What does change, once we understand Even's character more, is why Even does it.

Much later on in the season, in Episode 8's Saturday 11:11 clip, Even reveals that Sonja knows him so well, she makes him feel like she knows him better than he knows himself. Which makes him feel like she's controling what he is allowed to feel, and he's tired of it. He tells Isak, "She can't feel what I feel, or think, for that matter." They've been together for so many years that she's seen every side of him, and it makes Even feel a power imbalance.

This brings us to the other important aspect to Even's character—he's afraid of being alone. This is why he flips back and forth in his pursuit of Isak. Things between him and Sonja may not be ideal, but she represents safety, while the potential with Isak is the unknown. The risks in a new relationship is all further hightened by his bipolar disorder—something he hides from Isak out of fear of rejection. Sonja already knows about his manic and depressive episodes, and has dealt with them and stayed with Even despite them. He doesn't know if Isak will still want to be with him after knowing, and Even is afraid of finding out.

Even flips between hot and cold on Isak because he's got his own insecurities, too. Season 3 is Isak's POV, so we get to see Isak's insecurities and his struggles first hand, but Even's struggles happen largely off screen. In Episode 5's Wednesday 10:34 clip, when Isak offhandedly says he doesn't want mentally ill people in his life (since his mother obsessively quotes bible verses at him almost daily), it sends Even back to Sonja, to safety—right after Even initially makes the decision to tell Sonja about Isak, and to part ways from her.

Even first kisses Isak in the Friday 21:21 clip of Episode 4. They later spend Saturday 15:15 in Episode 5 together lounging in Isak's room, before Even sneaks away the next morning at Sunday 09:32. Once Even gets together with Isak, he makes the decision to break up with Sonja, but until he can be certain of Isak's commitment, he only says they're on a "break."

When he initiates the conversation with Isak, Even looks very unlike his usual self, in a way we haven't seen him until now. He looks very uncertain and sullen, the usual confidence and joy in his eyes are gone. Instead, he's wrapped in multiple layers and is covered up, as if shielding himself—this look is reminiscent of his later appearance in Episode 9, with the same kind of stark vulnerability. Only when Isak confirms he's on board does Even briefly bounce back to his usual bright, confident self.

Insensitive as Isak's words may have been—"I decided my life would be better without mentally ill people around me."—we don't fully realize their true impact on Even until Episode 8, when Even has a manic episode. From Episode 6 to Episode 7, Even sends more mixed signals to Isak. He flucuates between seeking out conversations with Isak at school and dropping drawn notes in Isak's locker and pocket, to ignoring Isak's texts thanking him for the drawings. His resolve to give up on Isak wavers as he can't resist seeking out Isak, even though he's deeply afraid Isak will reject him once his bipolar disorder is revealed.

At the end of Episode 7, in Friday 18:26, when Isak's friends help him message Even, they reunite and resume their romance. Even puts aside his fears of being alone and risks safety, breaks up with Sonja for real, and spends the next morning, in Saturday 11:11, being very domestic and sweet with Isak. They spend Episode 8 being fairly open about their status, with Even meeting Isak's friends, and publicly proclaiming Isak as his boyfriend to a hotel staff when they check in to a suite for a romantic evening.

As they enjoy their romantic night together, Even's manic episode reachs its peak and he starts saying various outlandish statements, which leaves Isak a bit apprehensive. When Isak wakes up in the middle of the night, Even dashes out of their hotel room completely naked, still caught up on the the high of his previous fantasy of getting married naked.

In a panic, Isak gets dressed and tries to run after Even. When he realizes how out of depth he is, Isak contacts Sonja for help. Once Even is located, she tells a confused and shaken Isak that Even is manic, and that their entire romance was just a sick idea Even had. To drive the message home, she tells Isak that the previous year, Even had memorized the Quran in Arabic because at the time, he thought it was a good idea.